(transparent latitudes of tenderness)
i search for shadows
molds
hairs
of yours.
in flagsgtaff.
a town so brown in tint, it feels gray. graying with the dying sun of winter.
disruptions pass through as trains.
foolishly, i forget that omens brush up against cheeks and skin as reminders, factors of existence.
you aren’t only a shadow.
you are in chicago. a placeholder of my love, mischievous and tall. abandoned, as it was growing; retching postures onto pavement.
i hope to approach from a return. again.
you find bits of me there. scattered about the sidewalks, and the rainbo room.
in a gas station bathroom behind a stall somewhere in the desert, someone of the maternal, beseeches a son to pee on his own.
i think of you as child.
your adolescence and infancy, with mom, dad aji granny.
supporting roles and protagonists of a childhood of marble mornings.
kitchadi smothered in mouth. warmth through blending of of fats and turmeric.
an avenue to reconnection. love’s conduit.
i wanted to kiss you, on the forehead on the stomach. eyelids. embracing all of you.
protective.
scooping up all in my arms.
your essence breathing. like a chest rises and falls.
in the shrill delicacy of dawn… the strained winter sun.
Born in Kiev, Ukraine, Olga works within the mediums of photography, text, and installation. Her focus is on memory, home, (dis)place, language, inheritance/loss and the disruptive. She currently resides in Olympia, WA, where she co-founded and co- curates Desuetude gallery.
Photo by Olga Mikolaivna
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